Before I was comfortable with myself, years ago, the thought of being completely naked in a brightly lit room in front of anyone except myself was nerve-racking. Now, I feel almost cheated if I don't allow the sun to pierce through the windows on my body acting as my spotlight. I feel robbed if I'm wearing anything other than my anklet on my left ankle and my bracelet on my right arm that I never, ever take off. I want my natural hair, my curls and coils to be revealed. I want the full form of my lips to glisten and I need my violent curves to be admired for everything it is. Light music or the sounds of the ocean from my Zen playlist, no essential oils in my diffuser, just my body's oils and my natural fragrances.
Naked. Raw. Real.
It is truly the best of me and simultaneously, the worst of me, which, I've heard is really the best of me. But it is me. It is who I am and that boldness, comfort, fierceness and sexiness is now finally embodied in my art.
For the first time, I am not afraid, embarrassed or unsure. I've been able to turn the lights on in this area of my life and let everything glisten in my glory. My first project, To All The Men I've Loved, is simply as real as it gets. It is unfiltered. Naked. Rude. Unapologetic. Bold. Sexy and the art of a real, confident bad bitch. I am naked as fuck. Lights on. Wig off. No silk robe. No lace set. Just body butter and vibes. It has taken me so long to put out my own music because I simply do not write fiction. I am, however, a storyteller and stories are told best from the horse's mouth, the stallion's mouth.
It takes a whole lot to be comfortable and confident with yourself as an artist to put out the raw and the unfiltered. No, it is not for everyone as I, too, am not for everyone. I don't expect everyone to love it. I don't expect everyone to like it. But, you really have no choice but to respect anyone who can confidently say, "this is my story. this is my shit." and put it on some fire beats in a carefully thought out project in notes to all the men that helped make me the lover that I am, the woman that I am, the bitch that I am. A bad bitch with heart. Lights on. Fully naked or not at all.
So my music, my art is me in a room, California king sized bed, lights on, no makeup, anklet on the left ankle, bracelet on the right arm, lightly oiled skin, passion in my eyes and lust on my lips.
Comfort. Confidence. Creativity. Charisma.
Now, that's some shit I can get behind.